Philippians 3:13-14 says-
Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
My husband read these verses to me this morning and short commentary from his devotional book. Even though I have heard these words many times, I had him read aloud to me once more. Something about it bothered me...my husband could see that, but I couldn't explain why "forgetting what lies behind " troubled me so much.
As I discussed this frustration with my husband, one thing became clear...I don't want to forget what lies behind...
Oh. THAT'S what it was.
I grabbed my bible. I'm no theologian, but I wanted to read it in the right context. I wanted to know what Paul said before and after, who he said it to. Maybe that would help me. And I prayed... Surely God would give me wisdom to understand this!
I have to say, it made me very uncomfortable to read God's Word telling me to forget what lies behind and then realize I had no intention of doing so! Here's why:
By remembering the mess I left behind, the nightmare I was rescued from, I have a clearer picture of who I am today because of Christ. By forgetting, I felt that I wouldn't give proper glory and honor to Him who deserved it all. I needed the contrast of light vs dark, good vs evil, LIFE vs DEATH. I needed it to see clearly.
I don't ever want to forget.
But I also don't want to burdened by it. I have freedom in Jesus that allows me to move forward, to press on toward the goal.
Is that what this means? Or am I inviting trouble? My desire is to obey God...
I welcome your thoughts on this too.
Photo: My husband and I, just a month or two before we were saved. Despite our smiles, we were not "happy" and were each a wretched disaster. God is good. :)